Surveillance cameras observe a fox exploring the Tudor and Georgian rooms of the National Portrait Gallery at night.
This is also hilarious because the Tudor portraits are upstairs on like the third floor so that fox also had to go up the stationary escalators long story short he was on A Mission
This is so accurate. At school, we literally have children who will watch our facial expressions to see if them falling is as bad as they think it might be.
CORRECT CHILD INJURY PROCEDURE:
do not react. at the most, maybe wince and go “ooooh”
go over to the child to assess panic level and severity of injury
if they’re like, dying, remain calm, but they’re probably not.
look them in the eye and ask, “you okay?” they will nod. possibly all teary-eyed. then ask, “are we gonna need to cut it off?”
the child is thrown off. if they giggle, you’re in the money. if they do not, put a bandaid on and do some sympathetic patting. they are probably a little teary. let the sad little bug sit out for a minute. they will quickly get bored.
works every time
“sad little bug” is the cutest and most accurate term ive heard used to describe a child because sometimes bugs are kinda super cute sometimes bugs are really fucking annoying and sometimes bugs are downright TERRIFYING
My dad used “should we cut it off?” And it worked EVERY TIME.
This can also help you assess how bad the injury really is! If jokes and a calming tone to the situation don’t work, they might be more seriously hurt than usual.
Seriously, when my littles would fall or trip in dance class, and if they looked like they were about to cry, I would run over and start over dramatically assessing the floor, saying like, “woah! Is the floor ok? Is it broken? Is that a dent there?” And have them look, and if they’re focusing on the floor and giggling about how theatrical I am about the whole thing, I know they’re fine. How kids react to falling or being startled is like, 95% based on how the adults around them react.
Social referencing
My friend gives her little boy scores out of 10 for how dramatic the fall is while joking with him. Always adorable.
You can literally make anything and anyone problematic if you try hard enough seriously give me people and things and I’ll make them all “problematic” right now.
Dogs.
I don’t even have to do this one because PETA did it first by insinuating domestication is inherently abusive.
The sky
Used to trick and mock anyone who asks “what’s up?” A bullying tactic.
Super Mario Bros.
Stereotypes Italians, enforces the narrative of women who need men to rescue them, and encourages violence against turtles.
John Mulaney
He was over on the bench and he SAW what they did to Tyler and he did NOTHING.
Omfg
Pokemon
Making your pets fight repeatedly is animal abuse.
OP
OP literally argued that dogs were problematic but go off I guess
This is a work of art and should be sent to everyone as soon as they sign up for Tumblr so they know what they’re walking into
Sinkholes like this one in Xuanen, China, form from the natural movement of underground rivers and currents.
Eventually, a section of the roof will weaken and collapse, forming a portal to the underground passages below. Often, with the addition of sunlight from a collapsed roof, the fertile and moist underground passages become a hotbed for various plants and animals that form a biodiversity that is both largely unlike the species found on the surface, and is also very dependent on the specific composition of these underground spaces. ⠀
The fact that you can’t raise taxes on billionaires even slightly without them pouring money into fascist political movements is, of itself, evidence that billionaires as a class shouldn’t be allowed to exist in the first place.
You, ah, don’t think it’s unfair to judge people’s morals based on their finances?
I, ah, think that it’s perfectly fair to judge people’s morals based on the amount of money they pour into neo-nazi political movements, yeah actually.
And what about the billionaires that don’t? Condemn all billionaires no matter what I guess
There is no ethical way to be a billionaire.
But why?
Because there are a limited amount of resources and currency. To have that much wealth you have to exploit others.
Do I gotta go find that post that demonstrates exactly how much a billion is? Because it’s a lot more than people think. Like, you know that saying that “a million dollars isn’t what it used to be”? Yeah? Well maybe that’s true for people who have a million dollars, but I still sure as fuck have never seen a million dollars and chances are I never will. Nor will most people. Eat the rich.
Lyft driver: “Your name, is Slavic? Me too. Bulgarian. I drive fast for you, brother.”
Now he’s waxing philosophical about the Ottoman Empire, imperialism, and human nature. “Humans? We are the most dangerous animal. Other animals, they kill when they need to. We kill when we think we need to. It is not the same.”
He just monologued about climate change and the military industrial complex, and the difficulty of having a Balkan identity when every Balkan country changes hands “every twenty years”. “Our history is getting swallowed by the biggest fish, and that fish getting swallowed by the next biggest fish, and so on.”
He had so many more gems. We compared family names, realized that his daughter shares my grandfather’s name (the feminine version), and then he started talking about The Old Country. The city where he grew up had a population of 300, and the population of his whole country could fit inside Chicago. He came here twenty years ago seeking a better life, but “everything in America is too big, the cars, the problems, the inequality”. He pointed to his phone and called it “stupid little computer” that’s meant to control his life, not to improve it, and how the world is getting steadily worse and the little people can’t do anything about it. He told me to continue my studies so that I don’t grow up to work in the service industry and can instead try to stop the concentration of power into the hands of corrupt people. Then he shrugged and said, “But who knows? Can anyone do it? I don’t know if it’s possible.”
